That moment when you’re at the Vietnamese nail salon getting your nails done and it suddenly dawns on you that the ex-boyfriend that you were so besotted with never really loved you…yes, that moment happened.
He cared. He cared a lot, but he just didn’t love me. I absolutely adored him. I had adored him for a long time, much longer than I even realised at first. It’s more the beautiful clarity and wisdom of hindsight that has shown me this since.
This might sound like a sad moment, like something I need to be comforted over but it really isn’t actually. The thing is that this realisation gives me closure and sets me free. It shows me that there is no point in missing what I thought we had – because it is exactly that – something that I thought we had – but in reality it was never there, it was never mutual but rather purely one-sided (being my side).
This does not make him a bad person; he was and probably still is an absolutely lovely person. He is kind and caring, loving and supportive – just never really in love with me. This is perfectly ok…now that I have realised this.